


Space Weevil

by Lapinporokoira



Category: Red Dwarf
Genre: 50 Sentences, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-08
Updated: 2016-10-08
Packaged: 2018-08-20 07:47:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8241776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lapinporokoira/pseuds/Lapinporokoira
Summary: Been into Red Dwarf again recently and felt like doing a 50 sentence challenge.Random title is random.Enjoy





	

**1\. Nice**

Either Lister was hallucinating from a bad Weevil Vindaloo last night or Rimmer really did say thank you for saving his life.

 

**2\. Tap**

As long as the beer kept coming Lister was going to ignore exactly where Kryten had added his beer tap extension.

 

**3\. Roses**

Cat never understood humans and their romance of giving roses to people they cared for, when a good spray of urine was surely good enough?

 

**4\. Gagged**

Rimmer was going to kill those smegheads, once he was able to get out of the holorope and gag they trussed him in.

 

**5\. Noisy**

Lister and Rimmer argued because they disliked each other, yet sometimes they did it just to fill the silence of a vastly empty ship that was once packed with the noise of other people.

 

**6\. Cat**

Cat was a selfish vain creature so of course he couldn't get enough of his own name.

 

 **7\. Blunder**  

“My fault entirely sir, I am such an 3com Audrey for bringing you the OMG My throat is being Murdered Hot Sauce instead of the Who needs to Live Hot Sauce you asked for.”

 

**8\. Cough**

It had started out as a cough but now Rimmer was stuck in a feverish mess in bed with a full blown Hologram Virus.

 

**9\. Tender**

Lister told himself it was OK because Rimmer was too out of it from the virus to notice, as he gently stroked the hologram's sodden brow with a damp cloth.

 

**10\. Kickass**

Even Napoleon's chief eunuch felt it as Lister kicked the invading Simulant in the nether regions.

 

**11\. Serious**

As seriousness went this was above even the end of the world or the serious face of Anne Robinson or a series of serious events that was so bad that the word serious was created to prove how serious it was; for Cat had worn all his outfits at least once and that was most serious indeed.

 

**12\. Neglect**

The others had decided to ignore Rimmer as a joke, which reminded him of his parents, so he started to pinch himself hard until it hurt and no-one noticed.

 

**13\. Sway(ing)**

Cat was a sexy beast and no doubt as he gyrated across the ship.

 

**14\. Comedian**

It was agreed that Holly was never again to try a comedy act after she used downloaded material from Bernard Manning's greatest hits.

 

**15\. Shadow boxing**

Cat was not going to let this pretender get away with the ugly faded black ensemble so he batted at the wall but found the stranger refused to budge and worse yet it copied his every move.

 

**16\. Incredible**

Lister could now say he would die happy after eating the most incredible curry he had ever tasted in his life.

 

**17\. Mundane**

It was laundry day with sheets to fold, pants to dye white again and socks to hammer back into shape and Kryten whistled happily as he did so.

 

**18\. Guide**

It was lost inside Rimmer's head and his Conscience was getting rather fed up with it.

 

**19\. Submerge**

Lister dunked his head to put out the flames that licked his dreads.

 

**20\. Sidekick**

Cat couldn't have cared less, Kryten was ecstatic at the thought and Rimmer refused to be considered anyone's sidekick least of all Listers.

 

**21\. Hip**

By using the word hip Holly was immediately anything but Hip.

 

**22\. Collared**

Cat could work anything, even a collar, and the bell that made tinkling sounds was so much fun to bat at.

 

**24\. Wallet**

Money was superfluous now so there wasn't any real need to have a wallet but Lister liked to keep one anyway as Wallets were also good for keeping pictures in like the one of him and his twin boys.

 

**24\. Roll**

When Rimmer was born, life rolled snake eyes.

 

**25\. Hands**

Since getting his hard light bee Rimmer couldn't stop touching anything he could his hands on, even the crusty feel of Lister's underpants was an exultant experience.

 

**26\. Jacket**

The junk freighter was falling apart at the seems, ready to explode, yet Lister refused to leave until he got his leather jacket back.

 

**27\. Global warfare**

Talkie Toaster had only asked the Gelf Chief if he liked Toast not knowing that toast was a symbol of war for the Gelf of that planet.

 

**28\. Crazy**

Two lumps of sugars in tea, that was crazy Kryten thought.

 

**29\. Indulgent**

Lister felt guilty sometimes but Kryten just enjoyed indulging him so much.

 

**30\. Party**

Space was dull, really dull and sometimes a party livened up the monotony.

 

**31\. Cry**

Arnold J Rimmer was not crying whilst his brothers twisted his arms back, for men of the Rimmer family were not supposed to cry.

 

**32\. Pound of flesh**

This was beyond humiliating for Rimmer, but Cat insisted for not telling Lister about catching Rimmer trying to burn his guitar that he owed him a favour to clean his entire wardrobe, only Cat expected it to involve using his tongue.

 

**33\. Punch**

There was obviously only one option when they found 100 gallons of Cranberry Juice hidden in the hold.

 

**34\. Absorb**

Lister was not one to waste a good spicy sauce even if it was collected from his own sweat.

 

**35\. Stiff**

If Lister was curry then Rimmer was pure starch the way he stiffly walked about the place.

 

**36\. Contract**

It may have been in his programming but when push came to shove Kryten was willing to break that contract.

 

**37\. Stumbling**

Lister was trying to scratch the inside of his leg cast which he had gotten after stumbling down the stairs after a drinking binge.

 

**38 Encounter**

Rimmer thought they had finally found aliens only it turned out to be a very large living mould that had grown from the trash Red dwarf had dumped on the planet eons earlier.

 

**39\. Temple**

The holy Wardrobe of outfits.

 

**40\. Patio**

Lister wanted a patio except that was kind of hard to get when they were in space and had no garden.

 

**41 Candlelight**

Under the flickering flame Lister raised a can of Beer in honour of the crew who had died.

 

**42\. Stripes**

Cat wouldn't be caught dead in Stripes.

 

**43 Foul**

If smells were alive then Lister's would be walking AND talking.

 

**44\. Hurdle**

It was just a small asteroid belt, they just had to do a bit of jumping to get around it.

 

**45 Chances**

Lister had almost told Kochanski how he felt but missed his chance long ago.

 

**46\. Forgetting**

There were times when Lister or Rimmer were reminded of little things back home that they no longer had now like listening to a radio or popping to the shops and realising they had forgotten what it was like.

 

**47\. Unforgivable**

Lister had promised not to mention Gazpacho soup again yet it somehow slipped out and Rimmer refused to forgive him this time.

 

**48\. Sinking**

Maybe landing Starbug on quicksand was not such a good idea.

 

 **49\. Deal**  

A handful of Bellyfluff, a neon green lightbulb, some peanut shells and a used condom; that was a pretty good haul for Poker night.

 

**50\. Friendship**

No-one ever said the word, but despite the insults and the jibes and the irritation the crew of the Red Dwarf could not deny that they were all friends.


End file.
